3 Steps To Minimize Threat Response In Conversations @ Work
How to keep a psychological safe environment with simple things you can do
How many times did you end up in meetings or conversations that were hard to manage and you had also difficulties controlling your own emotions?
How about avoiding misunderstandings and conflicts and managing your own emotions in simple 3 steps?
One of the main reasons this happens is because your brain perceives specific situations as threats. And when your brain thinks you are in danger, you start having fear and go out of the psychologically safe environment.
There are a lot of methods and a lot to learn about this topic. I am still learning continuously. Out of what I learned so far, I wanted to give you simple ways inspired by the SCARF model of Dr. D. Rock.
3 Steps To Minimize Threat Response In Conversations @ Work
😌 Seek clarity:
The better you understand the other person's perspective, the easier it is for you to move to a place of certainty and have a valuable conversation. So put questions to understand better!
Certainty is one of the SCARF model buttons is the ability to make clear predictions, but also the need for clarity. When you understand another person’s point of view, your certainty scarf button is pressed positively.
😌 The WHY behind the HOW
Understand the WHY behind the HOW. Focus on the opportunity for autonomy within the guidelines or processes you’re given. Where do you have options? Where do you have more autonomy?
Autonomy is one of the SCARF model buttons and it is a sense of control over one’s life, and ability to make choices. In a situation where, for example, your higher leadership decides on a topic that you need to implement, it is relevant for you to get the WHY behind and which options you have, the way you get to that goal.
😌 Social connection
When engaging in an interaction, remind yourself of the social connection you have with the other person. When you have a strong social connection, the brain releases oxytocin, which disarms the threat response.
Relatedness is another SCARF button which is a sense of connection with others, being familiar with what happens in your group. When you have a conversation, this button is active every time you find similarities or familiarities with the other person.
Bottom lines:
There are simple ways to avoid going into a deep threat while having a conversation with someone. Our brain does not make the difference between a bear in the woods and the fact that our conversation partner does explain clearly what they want and you are frustrated and feel like you cannot get what they want from you.
So why not apply simple steps not to go there?
Resources:
Book “Your Brain At Work” by Dr. D.Rock
Radio of Creativity: Finding the Frequency for Flow, Not Fear